{"id":4157,"date":"2016-03-08T11:51:53","date_gmt":"2016-03-08T19:51:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.lifeinfullcolor.com\/?p=4157"},"modified":"2016-03-08T12:11:21","modified_gmt":"2016-03-08T20:11:21","slug":"march-8-2016-fine-tuning-my-promise-to-paint-every-day","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lifeinfullcolor.com\/dev\/life-stories\/march-8-2016-fine-tuning-my-promise-to-paint-every-day\/","title":{"rendered":"March 8, 2016 &#8211; Fine tuning my promise to paint every day"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"fcbkbttn_buttons_block\" id=\"fcbkbttn_left\"><div class=\"fcbkbttn_button\">\n                            <a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/\" target=\"_blank\">\n                                <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.lifeinfullcolor.com\/dev\/wp-content\/plugins\/facebook-button-plugin\/images\/standard-facebook-ico.png\" alt=\"Fb-Button\" \/>\n                            <\/a>\n                        <\/div><div class=\"fcbkbttn_like \"><fb:like href=\"https:\/\/www.lifeinfullcolor.com\/dev\/life-stories\/march-8-2016-fine-tuning-my-promise-to-paint-every-day\/\" action=\"like\" colorscheme=\"light\" layout=\"standard\"  width=\"225px\" size=\"small\"><\/fb:like><\/div><\/div><div id=\"attachment_4155\" style=\"width: 502px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-4155\" class=\" wp-image-4155\" src=\"http:\/\/www.lifeinfullcolor.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/03\/morning-roses-WIP-3-8-16.jpg\" alt=\"I'm enjoying painting what I'm in the mood to paint - I'm loving being in the world of these roses.\" width=\"492\" height=\"365\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.lifeinfullcolor.com\/dev\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/03\/morning-roses-WIP-3-8-16.jpg 600w, https:\/\/www.lifeinfullcolor.com\/dev\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/03\/morning-roses-WIP-3-8-16-300x223.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.lifeinfullcolor.com\/dev\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/03\/morning-roses-WIP-3-8-16-200x148.jpg 200w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 492px) 100vw, 492px\" \/><p id=\"caption-attachment-4155\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">I&#8217;m enjoying painting what I&#8217;m in the mood to paint &#8211; I&#8217;m loving being in the world of these roses.<\/p><\/div>\n<p>Listen to this post:<\/p>\n<audio class=\"wp-audio-shortcode\" id=\"audio-4157-1\" preload=\"none\" style=\"width: 100%;\" controls=\"controls\"><source type=\"audio\/mpeg\" src=\"http:\/\/www.lifeinfullcolor.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/03\/20160308-Post.m4a?_=1\" \/><a href=\"http:\/\/www.lifeinfullcolor.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/03\/20160308-Post.m4a\">http:\/\/www.lifeinfullcolor.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/03\/20160308-Post.m4a<\/a><\/audio>\n<p>It\u2019s been over two months since I promised to paint every day, and I haven\u2019t missed a day yet. Though one day in January, all I did was paint colored squares in preparation for a color class, and there have been more than a few days that I\u2019ve painted for only a 10 or 15 minutes. But making the promise \u2013 and making it publicly to all of you &#8211; has had a marked effect on my relationship with time, scheduling and my dedication to paint. There have been days that I did not start out painting \u2013 which is <em>the<\/em> best way for me to start any day. And as 9:00 or 10:00 at night rolled around, I realized I\u2019d not painted. Because of my commitment, I\u2019ve picked myself up and gone into my studio (which is just one of the bedrooms in our house) and worked on a painting. In the past, I\u2019d absolutely have just let it go for the day.<\/p>\n<p>At the end of January, I went to LA for a workshop and a visit with my aunt and uncle. In order to have something to paint to take with me, I drew a small one of roses and raindrops, and I made myself a teeny little palette of paints. I painted each day before the workshop, as well as in the airport \u2013 both on the way there and back \u2013 a first! There was even one night \u2013 it was after 11:00 &#8211; I was in bed, cozy and warm and ready to call it a day &#8211; and I called bullshit on myself, when I told myself that I had painted. I had really just fiddled around for a few minutes. So, I got out of bed, wrapped up in my bathrobe, turned on the space heater at my feet under my painting table, listened to the silence of the sleeping house, and painted for half an hour. It was probably the most precious time I\u2019ve spent painting yet this year.<\/p>\n<div id=\"attachment_4154\" style=\"width: 493px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-4154\" class=\" wp-image-4154\" src=\"http:\/\/www.lifeinfullcolor.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/03\/little-painting-and-palette.jpg\" alt=\"my small painting and teeny palette has been sweet to pick up when I have just a short time to paint\" width=\"483\" height=\"322\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.lifeinfullcolor.com\/dev\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/03\/little-painting-and-palette.jpg 600w, https:\/\/www.lifeinfullcolor.com\/dev\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/03\/little-painting-and-palette-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.lifeinfullcolor.com\/dev\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/03\/little-painting-and-palette-200x133.jpg 200w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 483px) 100vw, 483px\" \/><p id=\"caption-attachment-4154\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">my small painting and teeny palette has been sweet to pick up when I have just a short time to paint<\/p><\/div>\n<p>As successful as this commitment has been so far, I see it\u2019s time to guide myself to another place, with my promise to paint every day. I\u2019ve been holding it largely as something I need to \u201cget in\u201d each day. I set the commitment as a way to bring meditation into my life on a regular basis. And the way I\u2019ve been doing it \u2013 and more importantly, the way I\u2019ve been holding it \u2013 has often not been in the spirit of meditation. I\u2019ve been aware of the deeply-felt place painting holds in my life for a while now. I remember one day &#8211; something like 8 years ago &#8211; talking to Sara, when she was the pastor at the church I used to go to. What came out of my mouth was that for me, painting is a <em>devotion<\/em>.<\/p>\n<p>As I was putting away the dishes from last night and thinking about what I\u2019d write about today, I remembered saying this \u2013 and wondered, what really is a devotion? So I looked it up! (I am letting myself look things up for my posts!). English is such a rich language and there are often many synonyms for a single word. The collection of synonyms can define a little universe which can say a lot. Here they are for devotion: <em>loyalty<\/em>, <em>faithfulness<\/em>, <em>fidelity<\/em>, <em>constancy<\/em>, <em>commitment,<\/em> <em>adherence<\/em>, <em>allegiance<\/em>, <em>dedication<\/em>, <em>fondness<\/em>, <em>love<\/em>, <em>admiration<\/em>, <em>affection<\/em>, <em>care<\/em>. When I look at these words, I see two things \u2013 there\u2019s <em>steadfastness<\/em> in the words from \u201cloyalty\u201d through \u201cdedication\u201d, and there\u2019s a <em>heart-centeredness<\/em> in the words from \u201cfondness\u201d to \u201ccare\u201d &#8211; a steadfast love. I\u2019ve been doing the steadfast part \u2013 what I\u2019m feeling the lack of, and wanting to bring in &#8211; is my heart \u2013 or more of my heart.<\/p>\n<p>This is one part of it, but there\u2019s another &#8211; a distinction I learned from Alison: there is a masculine (produce results) and feminine (in the timelessness of the moment) way to do just about anything. I can get ready in the morning, choose my clothes, do my hair and makeup, take my vitamins with the idea that I have to get it all done in as short a time as possible, efficiency expert front and center \u2013 OR I can feel my hands on my face as I put on my moisturizer, look at myself in the eye for a second as I put on my eye makeup, choose clothes that I feel good and lovely in. Who emerges from my bathroom is a whole different person depending upon which I am able to choose. Cooking is another arena to see this \u2013 I can <em>produce<\/em> food for dinner, or I can lovingly prepare a meal to nourish our bodies.<\/p>\n<p>Time is what makes the difference \u2013 either time is limited and I\u2019ve got to get a move on, or I have all\u2026 the\u2026 time\u2026 in\u2026 the\u2026 world. Here\u2019s the thing, time <em>is<\/em> limited on this earthly plane. We\u2019ve only so much in a day and in a lifetime. So how do I give myself the experience of getting myself ready, cooking, painting \u2013 living my life, a time-limited universe &#8211; in such a way that I feel I have all the time in the world?<\/p>\n<p>I feel resistance in me as I realize what this means. I need to actually <em>schedule<\/em> my time and have priorities. When I worked in the corporate world and had a boss and commitments to others, I was very good (well, a whole lot better anyway) at scheduling and \u201ctime-management.\u201d But now, that I work for myself I have been rather loose with time \u2013 especially on the days that I don\u2019t teach \u2013 the days that are all mine, to do with what I see fit. I let myself get pulled away by all kinds of things that are not on my radar. I schedule my appointments and meetings with others, but not my painting time, my marketing time, my email time. It\u2019s really <em>time<\/em>. In order to make my work my devotion, my prayer, it needs me to protect it from the other things that are crowding it out.<\/p>\n<p>As I think about spending time every day looking at how I\u2019m going to spend this day of my life, with an actual calendar, the resistance is re-doubling inside me, making it really apparent why I\u2019ve not been doing it. This part of me needs my attention! I\u2019m making the promise to that part of me \u2013 in front of you \u2013 I will listen to hear what it has to say, what there is to caution me about \u2013 what its fears are. Because I now know I must provide containers \u2013 pockets of time &#8211; to get lost in my painting \u2013 every day. Even if the pocket of time is 15 minutes, I want to have set it with intention \u2013 not just squeezed it in. I know that when I do, it\u2019s much more likely that I can arrive to it with that sense of devotion.<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m also aware of the break I\u2019ve given myself as of last week \u2013 and that this may seem like self-improvement. But it\u2019s clear to me, that \u201cpink time\u201d isn\u2019t pink unless it\u2019s given the space to be so. I know I won\u2019t be perfect at this. But it is my intention to keep coming back to it, when I fall back on getting pulled here and there \u2013 and when my inner-teenager wants to rebel.<\/p>\n<p>I feel a softness <em>and<\/em> a resolve in me as I finish this post. And I am so grateful for my relationship with you. Knowing you are there, knowing you are reading and listening &#8211; and taking on commitments of your own, as I\u2019ve heard a few of you have, pulls me along on. It reinforces a central belief \u2013 that life is lived in connection \u2013 on the web of invisible threads that bind us.<\/p>\n<p>With my love,<\/p>\n<p>Cara<\/p>\n ","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Listen to this post: It\u2019s been over two months since I promised to paint every day, and I haven\u2019t missed a day yet. Though one day in January, all I did was paint colored squares in preparation for a color class, and there have been more than a few days that I\u2019ve painted for only [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[29],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4157","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-life-stories"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v24.2 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>March 8, 2016 - Fine tuning my promise to paint every day - Life in Full Color<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.lifeinfullcolor.com\/dev\/life-stories\/march-8-2016-fine-tuning-my-promise-to-paint-every-day\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"March 8, 2016 - Fine tuning my promise to paint every day - Life in Full Color\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Listen to this post: It\u2019s been over two months since I promised to paint every day, and I haven\u2019t missed a day yet. 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